Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Poem #548

Notice Me Now?

I’ve tried so hard through all these years,
To blend into the background.
But when I’m with you, I thought you could see,
Beyond the shield, beyond the stone wall,
Because I always opened the door just for you.

I let you into my heart, into my mind,
Farther in than anyone had ever ventured.
And you seemed to care enough to push on through,
Regardless of what others loathed about me,
To grasp those things you loved about me.

I was always there when times got tough,
To listen to what you had to say,
Reach out a hand and pull you back to the surface.
You used to hear what I had to say,
And wouldn’t turn your back on me no matter what.

But suddenly it seems as though I’ve disappeared.
You no longer see me, listen to what I need to say,
You have left me behind, flown off without me.
And yet you haven’t noticed that anything changed,
You don’t notice how much pain I’m actually in.

Pull down the façade, make sure everything shows,
Carving out my feelings into the features of my body.
Sending you messages, distress signals,
That appear to go unnoticed by everyone.
Just walk on by. I don’t exist.

I try to throw everything out in the open,
Display the pain, carry the feelings on the outside,
Praying and wishing every day for you to finally notice.
I’m falling apart before your eyes but no one sees.
Please help me.

And now I feel invisible, even to you,
Lonely, with no one reaching out as I once did.
You see right past the struggle inside me,
Abandon me during the time I need you the most.
Please come back to get me.

I want to tell you everything, but I can’t find the words.
So I wait for you to grab onto me,
Pull me back up into the air, into the world,
So I can breath one more,
And know that you still care.

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